Why I’m Not Setting New Year’s Resolutions This Year

Jasleni Brito
Jan 5
3 min read

dominican artist and coach, Jasleni, looking down at her hands, holding sage, bookshelf behind her

Every January, the pressure is loud.

Change everything.

Fix yourself.

Become someone new.

Lose the weight.

Make more money.

Finally get it together.

And while that approach might work for some people, I’ve learned that for many of us, it creates more overwhelm than transformation.

This year, I’m not setting New Year’s resolutions. Not because I don’t care about growth, and not because I don’t have dreams or desires. But because I no longer believe that pressure is a sustainable path to change.

Resolutions often start from the wrong place

Most resolutions are rooted in the idea that something about us is wrong or not enough. They’re fueled by urgency, comparison, and the belief that we need to hurry up and become someone else in order to be worthy of the life we want.

That kind of change rarely sticks.

In my work as an artist, an art witch, and a confidence coach, I see this pattern again and again. When we try to force transformation, our nervous system resists. When we demand instant results, our body shuts down. When we pile expectations on top of exhaustion, we don’t become more disciplined. We become more disconnected.

Real change doesn’t happen when we’re in fight-or-flight. It happens when we feel safe enough to listen.

What I’m choosing instead

Instead of resolutions, I’m choosing reflection.

Instead of demanding overnight change, I’m choosing to spend this season listening to my body and my spirit. I’m asking quieter questions. Questions that are less about productivity and more about alignment.

Questions like:

What do I want to feel more of by this time next year?

What am I ready to stop carrying?

What would commitment look like if it didn’t feel like punishment?

This approach is slower, yes. But it’s also more honest. And honesty is what creates lasting transformation.

Desire does not need pressure to be valid

One of the biggest myths we’ve been sold is that if we don’t push ourselves hard enough, nothing will change. That desire must be paired with urgency to be taken seriously.

I don’t believe that.

I believe desire is information. It points us toward what wants to be lived, expressed, and experienced through us. When we give ourselves permission to want what we want, without shame or frantic timelines, something shifts.

What I desire desires me.

And I don’t need to chase it from a place of self-criticism to receive it.

Commitment can be gentle and still be powerful

Choosing not to set resolutions does not mean opting out of responsibility or growth. It means choosing a different kind of commitment. One rooted in devotion instead of discipline.

For me, that looks like tiny habits and inspired actions that feel supportive rather than draining. It looks like creating an environment that makes it easier to show up for myself. It looks like trusting that consistency grows naturally when safety is present.

This is not about lowering standards. It’s about raising the quality of our relationship with ourselves.

You are already worthy

As this year begins, I want you to know this.

You do not need to transform overnight to be worthy.

You do not need to earn rest, love, or belonging.

You do not need to punish yourself into becoming someone new.

You are already incredible.

If you feel called to grow this year, let it come from remembering who you are, not rejecting who you’ve been. Let it come from listening instead of forcing. Let it come from devotion rather than desperation.

That’s the kind of change that lasts.